Hi gang, this is Stephanie.
I really hit the wall over the weekend. I've been working so hard and my brain was so fatigued that I could barely think. Plus I was doing a lot of computer work and my shoulders ached. I caught myself eating unconsciously and feeling ravenous cravings for carbs. I was emotionally upset, very sad, feeling kind of hopeless.
On Saturday I woke up and there was a moment of clarity: "It's my brain chemistry!" I was tired and my brain was doing everything to help me "medicate" the problem.
No wonder I had been feeling so out of control.
I decided to take back control by becoming more aware of my physical needs and addressing them. I asked a few questions, like: What am I doing that's not actually working to improve the situation? (Answer: drinking cup after cup of coffee.)
And then I came up with the question that was more useful: How could I feel just 1% better right now? All day long I was coming up with responses that I had enough energy to implement: drink a glass of water, stretch on my blue exercise ball, eat some vegetables (I cooked some ratatouille), take a walk in the sunshine for ten minutes, do three deep full-lung capacity breaths, give myself a scalp run, and more. It helped to know I could respond and feel better.
Sunday, I never turned on the computer once. I also felt better from that. I got into bed and went to sleep early. So I woke up still tired, but sharper. Meaning, if I keep using the 1% rule strategy maybe tomorrow I'll feel better still than today.
If this is useful for anyone else, please take it. For myself, I'm still not all there mentally and physically, but it's better than the alternative. I'm switching out the caffeine for more water and walks in the sun. Thankfully, it's working.
As tired as I am I'm committed to loving myself better. I just have to learn how.
